Recurring Inner Device
English
Italiano
Row A, Seat 0
I don’t know how to behave, I can’t find my seat in the stalls of this immense baroque theatre, drenched in gold. I’m desperately searching for my usher, I swallow my words, I stutter as I ask: “Excuse me, could you kindly help me find the row with the correct number? I can’t find it, I’m losing my mind, and I wouldn’t want this performance to begin without me—without me being properly seated, without me being ready.” What an embarrassment that would be. And I paid dearly for this ticket. Meanwhile, the greatest performance ever staged unfolds: gargantuan scenography, Socratic dialogues, lights like the first dawn after the Big Bang.
I stand still and yet I tremble. A Demon takes hold of me. My heart is hammering in my chest, I’m sweating cold, I feel my insides twist. I’m haunted by one thought: that the other spectators might see me, watch me, judge me, study me as if I were some kind of rare beast. Have I longed to see this performance, or have I longed for the idea of being able to watch it? I am just a human being with drenched armpits, running back and forth between galleries and balconies, searching for this phantom seat that was promised to me. But who asked me to look for it?
English
Italiano
Row A, Seat 0
I don’t know how to behave, I can’t find my seat in the stalls of this immense baroque theatre, drenched in gold. I’m desperately searching for my usher, I swallow my words, I stutter as I ask: “Excuse me, could you kindly help me find the row with the correct number? I can’t find it, I’m losing my mind, and I wouldn’t want this performance to begin without me—without me being properly seated, without me being ready.” What an embarrassment that would be. And I paid dearly for this ticket. Meanwhile, the greatest performance ever staged unfolds: gargantuan scenography, Socratic dialogues, lights like the first dawn after the Big Bang.
I stand still and yet I tremble. A Demon takes hold of me. My heart is hammering in my chest, I’m sweating cold, I feel my insides twist. I’m haunted by one thought: that the other spectators might see me, watch me, judge me, study me as if I were some kind of rare beast. Have I longed to see this performance, or have I longed for the idea of being able to watch it? I am just a human being with drenched armpits, running back and forth between galleries and balconies, searching for this phantom seat that was promised to me. But who asked me to look for it?
Category
Film Photography
Date
2026
Camera: Voigtländer Bessa R4A Film Roll: Kodak UltraMax400
